Get Set

When I first met with Kara, she evaluated me in the usual trainer way. Basic fitness, the measuring of the fatness, vitals.

None of it came as any surprise to me.

I was 40 pounds over what would be an ideal weight for me.

I carry my weight in that dangerous area, around the middle (I'm an apple). And, the data showed that I was in that 30% body fat range.

My bp is managed with medication (TWO medications).

I liked my cocktails. (Still do).

I liked to eat. (Still do).

At the time I was still going to Weight Watcher meetings and I thought the training and the WW would be a good partnership. The trouble was, I had been going to WW for so long, it was like white noise. I was just not motivated by that program any more. In my early 30s, I had lost about 20 pounds with Weight Watchers (and no exercise). I kept it off for about 2 years after getting lazy and not attending the meetings or doing the program and I have never been able to have that success again. I also never made it to goal. Then, I wanted to lose 30 pounds to get to goal and lost 20. Now, I need to lose 40 pounds to get to the weight I got to when I lost the 20. Just typing that exhausts me.

Kara and I got started. I selected Wednesdays and Fridays for my training sessions. My thinking was that it's easier to self-motivate on Mondays.

I told her that I absolutely would not run. Ever. Not a runner. Not sporty. Not an athlete. I like lifting weights. Hate cardio.

She started slowly.

All these things are the things I have said every time I tried to start exercising.

But this was different in that deep down, I felt the commitment. I really did.

The first month, I worked hard. I didn't worry about my diet, but focused on merely getting to the gym. I did. I think I may have missed one session due to getting stuck at a pediatrician appointment.

I was astounded at how utterly painful our first session was. (Seriously, I hurt so bad, in ways I'd never hurt that I was convinced I had waited to long to get fit and it was too late). And then, I was astounded at how fast I made headway in endurance. Kara was amazing. She seemed to really get when I needed pushing and when I had to pull back and we continue on that path today.

The most depressing thing: in the first month, I gained three pounds. That really discouraged me. I nearly just stopped then. I thought, well, I'll be the first person to GET LESS FIT with exercise. (No I didn't really believe that, but GAH, Universe, throw me a friggin bone!) I decided that I HAD to be a person who exercises regardless of my weight. I told myself that even if I remain the same, or gain a few pounds, becoming a person who exercises regularly was better for me overall.

Life is full of family, friends, laughter. I'm not complaining. I'd really like to be around for a lot longer because of that.

I kept at this for the next six months. And, the weight pretty much hovered in the same place. But I kept going. Twice a week with the trainer.

On My Mark...

Me (on the left) having a fun time celebrating with my college BFF at Mardi Gras in New Orleans, Feb. 2015.

I turned 50 nearly one year ago on January 30, 2015. I've never been vain, but that number was a tough hurdle as I became increasingly worried about my health. I made it to 50 without a lot of issues and I consider myself lucky. I rarely exercised. I had more than my share of chemicals, late nights, close calls, and too much of many good things.

I crossed over the 50 marker in pretty good shape, considering. But, that person was about 40-50 pounds overweight, on blood pressure medication, on the verge of having to take cholesterol medication and possibly facing Type II diabetes.

Getting into a more healthy lifestyle grew increasingly difficult. One trip to the gym here and there. A few days of paleo or any of the nutty diets and a continual charge of $39 a month for my Weight Watchers membership produced no results. It got to the point where I would tell myself there was no point. Why even bother? I didn't get a running start at 30 or 40, why would 50 be any different? I was a few years away from a heart attack, stroke or heart failure. Or, even worse, having a few good friends who lived a healthy lifestyle unable to even make it to 50 due to cancer, suicide, brain tumor.

I felt doomed.

About a month after my birthday, this profound feeling of doom really affected me in a way I'd never experienced before. I dragged myself to the gym and left in tears because I really felt that I had squandered my life and let myself go and there was no way to change anything. I was too late and at 50, there was no point to getting fit.

I combed the Internet trying to find ONE real story of a person like me with absolutely no history of making this sort of change until the age of 50. I can't find it. I can't find the books or stories of a person who didn't do sports as a child or young person and decided to make a change at 50. If I thought I did, I'd dig deeper and the person will point out that they had lost weight at some point when they were younger, or they used to play sports as a kid or something. Many, MANY self help books were written by people who were already pretty fit. I hate these people. They do not inspire me. They simply make me feel like the battle has been lost. I didn't do it when I was younger, so I would be doomed.

I still felt doomed.

In February, right after my 50th birthday, I started looking into the idea of getting a personal trainer. I had used a trainer in the past with moderate success and I thought if I could simply get myself to the gym, I'd feel better. I decided, at 50, that I wanted to be a person who exercised and that if I exercised without losing any weight, I'd be better off as a fat exercising person than a fat person who did not exercise.

It was then that I was led to a new training gym near my home that had just opened a few weeks before and before I could blink, I was meeting with Kara and getting evaluated.

And that's how the journey begins.